You may know it as Valentine's Day. You're less educated friends may know it as Valentimes Day. I wish I were making that up.
Yes, it's once again your chance to fail at meeting your sweetie's expectations.
This primarily is for the men out there. Both of you. Because the pressure is on us. Women just have to show up with beer and get nakey on the 14th. We have to meet those increased expectations and have grand plans that involve romance.
I remember one Valentimes where the girl I had asked the girl I was dating what she wanted. She said, "I just want you to be extra sweet to me all day long."
"Flowers it is," was my reply.
I've since learned not to be so lippy around teh womenfolk.
It's best to just go with the most expensive jewelry you can afford, pretend you're listening while she's talking about feelings, and go to the drive through and do it bunches.
Gentlemen, there are several gifts you probably should avoid:
- Fur bra liners (even if you live somewhere really cold)
- Any household appliance
- Tattoo gift certificate (good for your name only)
- Ceiling fans
- Flowers from the gas station
- A misspelled cake
- A Snuggie with a strategically cut hole
- Dinner out at any restaurant involving a coupon
- Tiddy Bear
- Health club membership
I'm sure there are others.
What's the worst VD gift you ever got? Or gave?