So Texas has something called the Big Tex Choice Awards (wow, wonder how long it took them to come up with that name) where they pick the Best Fried Food at the fair. You can read the whole boring story (including quotes from future angioplasty patients) at the Dallas Snooze.
Here's the important part--the entries:
- Fried Banana Split
- Texas Fried Jelly Bellys
- Fire & Ice (a deep fried pineapple ring)
- Fried Chocolate Truffles
- Chocolate-Covered Strawberry Waffle Balls
- Deep Fried S'mores
- Chicken Fried Bacon
- Fernie's All-American Fried Grilled Cheese Sandwich
Mmmm, doesn't that make you want to have a great big deep fried s'more washed down with a warm orange soda with a long, hot walk on some pavement followed by a spin in the Tilt-a-Hurl.
Well I won't keep you in suspense. The winner is......Chicken Fried Bacon! Could anyone ever have doubted the power of bacon. A food so good that (in the words of Jim Gaffigan) you wrap other food in to make it taste better. Like you'd ever have tried a water chestnut without the power of bacon.
Yup, that's the winner over there. Please try not to lick your computer screen. All that drool is bad for the electronics.
But don't worry if you're not into Chicken Fried Bacon. They also have a Corn Dog Eating Contest. No word on whether you're allowed to use your hands or not. And mayonnaise. Entries must be submitted by September 15th. What are you waiting for? Get cracking!
And remember, if you're eating your corn dog erotically, everyone's a winner.