Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Everything's Better When Wet

I've not watched a jot of the Olympics. It's because I'm protesting the Chinese treatment of Tibetan refugees.

And because I hate all the sports.

Except for basketball which is seemingly only played at 4 a.m. And the fencing which would be even better if they didn't have all those sissy pads. Come on, let's see some bloodshed for crying out loud.

Anyhoo, I know there was a bunch of hubub, bub. Michael Phelps won everything. I still liked this story better when it was Mark Spitz.

Suits Me

But do the men know they're wearing women's suits?

I saw some highlights on ESPN and wondered if they were showing us swimming footage from the 1920 Olympics just to see if anyone was paying attention. They had everything but bathing caps on.

What is all the furor over the swim suits? It seems like if you really wanted to be fast in the water, you'd just go nakey. Wouldn't that cut down on drag the most? It couldn't hurt the ratings either. I'm buying Sony stock because I figure a lot of tv's are going to need replacing from all the women folk who've been licking the screen over the last two weeks.

And we'd win more medals because the Chinese men's team would be too ashamed to get in the pool

4 comments:

Rox said...

I watched a six minute Taekwondo match last night where the judges robbed the Canadian girl, that's all the Olympics I watched.

Phelps has such a weird looking head, I can't stand it!

Anonymous said...

I usually dislike sports (except a little baseball), but I've been watching the Olympics a lot. I saw a bunch of 12-year-old Chinese girls trying to pass for 16 in gymnastics. I saw a 38-year-old woman take the gold in the marathon. I've also seen a lot of women's beach volleyball. A lot. There, I said it.

As for swimming naked, if you think that's the best way to cut back on resistance, then you must be one smooth fellow!

Swistle said...

I believe going nakey results in, um, rudder problems.

t2ed said...

Those swimmers all shave. And you know it's some serious manscaping.

And Swistle, I was going to make an even keel joke but you beat me to it.