Come On People Now

I don't know exactly when I crossed over to the Dark Side. Maybe it was that final flight from Dallas to Salt Lake. The one where I was in the last row of the plane between the galley and the bathroom. Where the smell of ass combines with microwave chicken fajitas (available for the low price of $7) and the chair doesn't actually recline. And I got to sit next to a poor, poor mother travelling with a newborn.

And when Mommy saw me in the aisle attempting to wedge my ass into some semblance of comfort in the shiat seat I had been provided, she perkily chimed up with, "Hi, I'm in the corner."

So I countered with the only thing I could come up with after a day of being pummelled by the tragedy that is air travel in this country:

"No one puts baby in the corner."

Yup, a Patrick Fucking Swayze line actually came out of my mouth.

So I've decided to let go my anger.

And when the fine folks at Unicef sent me this while I was gone, I had only one response.

Oh, sure, they probably don't actually figure people are going to check the boxes and send it back to them. Maybe someone in their direct mail department will get a little chuckle out of this.

From now on, I only donate to cheerleader car washes.