Friday, September 14, 2007

Only Five Days Left

Get ready, swabbies.

The best day of the year is coming in less than 5 days. Yes, it's almost time for International Talk Like a Pirate Day again. Wow, time flies when you drink all that rum and do all that wenching.

So put down that cabinet hardware and grab your cutlass and buckle your swashes. What is a swash anyway and how does it keep coming unbuckled anyway?

And while I'll be celebrating TLAPD with an Errol Flynn double feature of Against All Flags and Captain Blood and making the Wife slowly go nuts by repeating "Arrrrrr" all day, here's how other celebrities will be celebrating the day.

Lindsay Lohan: Long John Silver's carryout and rehab sex
Tom Cruise: Dressing up like Horatio Nelson
Keith Richards: Drinking rum and incoherency
Keira Knightley: Splurge with an entire bean for dinner
Orlando Bloom: Admiring self in mirror
Johnny Depp: Not showering
Bill Nighy: No such person exists; he is just a special effect
George W. Bush: Ordering the Black Pearl deployed to the Persian Gulf
Geraldo Rivera: Special Investigative Report live from Pittsburgh

Enjoy the day, kids.


Chunks said...

Johnny Depp: not showering. That's right. We are having a big old bubble bath together instead!!

Ahhhh, he is my favorite pirate. Argggh!

latt├ęgirl said...

Thanks for the reminder -- I never can remember when TLAPD is, and will probably forget again this year.

Misplaced said...

I'm with Lattegirl, it seems every year I'm at some all-night store trying to buy an eye patch at midnight.

It saddens me that the religious aspect of "Talk Like a Pirate Day" has been lost. i.e "Argg Father fergive the scurvey bastards- dey know not what dey do Matey!"

p.s. Rehab sex is awesome. Hopefully sex in hell will be as satisfying

Reigning Frog said...

Britney Spears: covering her crotch with an eye patch

Sean Astin & Josh Brolin: Reliving Goonie days by dressing as Sloth

Paris Hilton: Finding God through not partying on this day

Brangelina: Adopting homeless pirates

K-Fed: Rolling out the custom-made trucker/pirate hat

OJ Simpson: Stealing buried treasure