Cuts Like a Knife

This one comes to us from Michigan, kids. And it's a little rough so hang on tight.

In Allen Park, police found a man who had killed himself in wooded area with a guillotine he built himself. Police even found the store receipts at which he had purchased the materials he needed to assemble the guillotine.

Now, I don't know how MacGuyver pulled this off. It's all I can do to find a warm body at Home Depot. And I know the kind of advice I get when asking electrical questions. You can only imagine what kind of "customer service" you'd get if you asked for a blade "Oh, big enough for a guillotine."

Why do I have the feeling this is all because his Wife wouldn't let him get one of those poker tables?

It's too bad this gentleman couldn't get the help he needed. If you're depressed, see a professional. And not just a a professional bar tender.

Because you know this guy's house would have kicked ass at Halloween. At least once anyway.

Oh, and you know this is going to be on CSI Miami next week. Now take off those damn sunglasses already, Whitey.