Wednesday, May 16, 2007

You Ain't Nothing But a Hound Dog

Because I know you only come here for news of Guinness the Wonder Dog (and his never ending requests for a steak sandwich), I'll spare you and speak type of other subjects today.

How 'bout Prozac for dogs? I'm not making this up. I swear they stole this idea from Saturday Night Live.

Eli Lilly has announced new, magic pills to cure all your dog's ills called Reconcile. It's a cheweable, meat flavored pill that's a form of Prozac made for your pooch. Hmm, chewable and meat flavored? Sign me up.

Reconcile is designed to cure "separation anxiety" in your dog. Now I'm sure this is a legitimate psychological condition in your pet and not just some marketing weasel's made up technobabble just to move a lot of pills. Reconcile is designed to keep your pet from "chewing destructively, inappropriate urination and/or defecation, vomiting or worse."

I don't know how many dogs the people of Reconcile actually own, but what's worse than what's on that list? Sneak attacks while you nap? Gunplay?

I'm not a licensed dog psychologist, but I don't anthromorphize a creature who would eat his own poo and lick himself all day if we let him. The only "separation anxiety" my dog has is for his balls. My dog doesn't need Prozac but some days it seems like smoked some crack.

But if giving your dog a meat-flavored tranquilizer makes life easier for you, rock on with your bad self. But I'd try playing him some soothing music first.


latt├ęgirl said...

Ooh yeah, Ritalin for dogs. What's next? Zoloft for tots?

I cured my dog of her destructive behaviour, whenever I left the house for 5 minutes.

It's called an Elizabethan collar, and you can buy them for many $$ at a pet shop or you can (as I did) make one from a large container of bleach.

An empty container, I might add, although I was, on many occasions, tempted to feed the dog pure bleach, because she was a purebreed who took two (2) years to be housetrained.

Oh, the things I write in your comments. Perfectly good blog posts for myself, and look at me.

Wasting them on a 3.10.

Iwanski said...

I personally spent at least five hours each day doing raki on my pets.