The only thing I can come up with is that people (and by people I mean Assbag Senators) were too busy grandstanding and only asked softball questions that their staffers had prepared. Here were the questions I would have asked:
- How long should you let a dead woman's body remain underwater in your car before you call the police?
- When you cheat in law school and plagiarize someone else's writing, how do you feel it should impact your campaign for the presidency?
- What is the most expensive gift you've ever received illegally from a lobbyist?
- What is the most egregious amendment you've ever attached to an appropriation to make sure your home district gets to suckle from the public teat?
- Better Darrin: Dick York or Dick Sargent?
- Paper or Plastic?
- Have you ever had a real job not connected with politics that your family didn't get or create for you?
- Nude, All Nude or Totally Nude?
- How much income tax did you personally pay last year? How much did you really owe?
- When was the last time you had sex with an intern? Male or female?
- How many times can you cheat on your spouse but still run on a campaign of family values? How many divorces have you personally had? How many marriages or weddings have you broken up?
- Can you sleep while sitting up and wearing a dark robe?
- Do you think your job as a judge is to make history or pick the next Miss Universe?
- If you die and go to hell and have to cross the River Styx, will you row or wade?
- Have you ever knocked up your high school sweetheart and then needed a quickie abortion so you wouldn't have to get married and wind up working at a Shell station with your name on your uniform?
- Have you stopped making your wife cry during confirmation hearings?
- Who is the biggest assbag you've ever met in Washington, DC? Not including Dan Snyder.
Man this had such potential. It's a shame a few bad apples have to ruin a good time for everyone.
1 comment:
Not including Dan Snyder? Oh...give me a minute, I know this one...
Post a Comment