Here's the formula: 1/8W+(D-d)3/8xTQMxNA I'm sure that's crystal clear now, eh?
That equation is supposed to factor in weather (W), debt (D from maxed out Christmas bills that finally arrive in January), subtracting your monthly salary (d) from all that debt, time (T meaning post Xmas blues and failing at your New Year's Resolutions), not quitting a bad habit (Q), low motivation (M) and the need to do something (NA). Oh and it's on a Monday because I don't like Mondays.
And I think some of the surveying may have been done in Denver and North Carolina.
So with all that depression likely hitting everyone today, here's what you can do. Get a little comfort food (I'm opting for macaroni & cheese), kick off your shoes and let the following Random Monday Musings take hold of your brain.
- I'm betting that Jennifer Aniston got good and drunk last weekend.
- Now that they fixed baseball, Congress is going to tackle coal mines.
- Osama Bin Laden's tape translated to "You're doing a heck of a job, Bushie. Oh, and death to America."
- You just know the Super Bowl is going to be a blowout too.
- Now that Wilson Pickett and Shelley Winters are dead, can Abe Vigoda be far behind?
- Would you attend Brokeback Mountain if you could wear assless chaps and throw yogurt?
- To coach the Lions, does your name have to start with an M?
- Will Michael Jackson's first attraction be named Mr. Toad's Pantless Ride?
- E hiring Isaac Mizrahi for the red carpet because you wanted something "surprising" was a great move. You sure couldn't get that with Kathy Griffin.
- If I pretended to be gay, could I grope Scarlett Johansson?
That's it. I'm tapped out, kids. Be strong...at least for the rest of the day.
3 comments:
You so just talked me down from a ledge. Thanks. . . I think.
Hey I saw Matchpoint yesterday and I'm not so sure Ms. Scarlett is the actress I thought she was (not that I think you're caring about her acting ability). Maybe the little gal was out of sorts after having to teethe on Woody's woody for the part.
P/S I only talk dirty because I think you like it.
Yeah, you're a real potty mouth. You've obviously never heard me during a basketball game on tv. Woody is tame--very tame.
Saw The Island this weekend. Meh. I don't ever remember seeing Scarlett in anything. Suddently, one day, POOF, she's famous and we're supposed to pay attention to her. And I saw Lost in Translation and all I remember is Bill Murray, slowness and there's no way these two would hook up. And I think I'd remember that rack.
She's probably had work done. Ick.
I'm going to see Brokeback Mountain tomorrow. I have to breakout the assless chaps tonight. Though, I'm pretty sure no one there will want to see me in them.
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