Monday, September 18, 2006

Get My Drink On At the Crack of Dawn

Because we've fixed everything else in our great State of Michigan, we're working on the Sports Fans Bill of Rights. Sure we may not know what to do about the Ford Motor Company, striking Northwest Airlines Flight attendants and just settled our Detroit Public School Teachers' Stike, but we take our football seriously.

State Representative Leon Drolet (R-Macomb Township) has a couple of ideas to make the Lions games at Ford Field more exciting. First, allow alcohol sales to start at 7:00 am instead of noon on Sundays. Second, fans should be allowed to wave signs that criticize the management of the Lions. And by "the management" he means Matt Millen.

If you got to see any of the Lions' games (a 9-6 loss to the Seahawks and a Chicago Bear blowout), you'll easily understand why fans should be able to start drinking early and often. It's chemically impossible to be in a state of alcohol induced numbness sufficient to watch the Lions in only an hour.

I especially liked Roy Williams celebrating a catch yesterday against da Bears. He made a grab then got up and did the first down handmotion. Too bad they were down by 24 points by then. And that's after Roy had guaranteed a win against the Bears earlier in the week. Way to rile up the best defense in football, Roy.

And Matt Millen sucks donkey balls. Since taking the helm of the Lions five years ago, they have the worst record in the entire NFL. There are even websites devoted just to getting him fired. Rep. Drolet argues that since public money was used to fund the stadium, we should not be curtailing free speech there.

Whatever, college boy. As long as we can get into the sauce a little bit earlier, we might actually be able to stomach another 6-10 team this year. Next week the 0-2 Packers are on the schedule. Something has to give....


Jorge said...

And again I will leave a comment unrelated to your post. :)

Not really any home improvement required, man.

Quite a lucky break!

nobich said...

I don't really care much about football but I am for any sport that encourages drinking at 7:00 am be it a Sunday or any day.
Go Lions!!

angelatee said...

My old landlord was named Leon Drolet.

He made me and my old roomate walk 3 miles each way to get a beer with him one time.

Iwanski said...

As a Bears fan, all I can say is..... oh, better not say it.

Kim said...

You have the Lions, I have the Redskins. You have Matt Millen, I have Dan Snyder.


Why do we put ourselves through this? Wouldn't it just be easier if we became Colts fans?

May our we both beat the crappiest teams next week.