We Got the Meat?

(with apologies to the GoGo's)

There's something wrong with me. Something very, very wrong. No, not my fascination with boobies and stupid stuff. That's normal. Normal, I tell you.

It happens when I go to the butcher store.

This is an Occasion. Note the cap O. Because the real, live butcher store is across town. So it's a planned event. And because it's not an everyday happening like just stopping by the Sprawl-Mart or Try-N-Save, it somehow seems special.

Special in being able to ask a white-apron-bedecked man questions about his meat. Yes, that just sounds dirty. It's not, you pre-verts.

And because this weekend is a good one (extra days for grilling, smoking, beer-drinking, back porch philosophizing), we'll be doing some extra meating around these here parts.

Here's what is currently on tap:

• Pork Shoulder (currently cooking in the Crock Pot 'O Doom with about a cup of apple cider and some sea salt; it's just for tonight--no biggie)
• Beer Can Chicken (two of these bad boys will go in the Big Green Egg for some smoking)
• Porterhouse Steaks (these will get grilled on the regular ole propane grill. Probably on Sunday as they're currently marinating in some red wine with whole peppercorns and Italian seasoning)
• Baby Back Ribs (one rack currently rubbed with some of Billy Bones rub; the other is marinating in some teriyaki. Both will get smoked for a few hours, wrapped in foil and then finished on the propane grill)
• Lamb Shanks (these look like lil baby t-bone steaks. I love grilled lamb. These are small so may either get thrown on the smoker in some stray space and used as an appetizer or grilled by there own selves. Currently in the same marinade as the Porties)
• Sun-Dried Tomato & Chicken Sausage (these will get smoked on the Egg. I cram them in where there's room and then use the snausage in a pasta sauce during the week. Or maybe I sneak one when I'm outside with a stick and beer while I "supervise" the outdoor cooking demonstration)
• Bratwurst (same as the chicken snausage above)

See what I mean about a problem? There's no way all this gets cooked and eaten this weekend. And we'll have to run the dogs in the morning or they'll smell all that meat cooking and turn on me and start gnawing on my face when they figure out it's not for them.

Oh, and the only side I've got done is some pasta salad already chilling in the fridge. There's also some random talk of either baked or twice-baked spuds. Maybe a fruit salad if I'm feeling saucy.

But you've got to admit. Too much meat is a good problem to have.

What are you up to this weekend? Whatever it is, hope ya'll have a good Memorial Day, kids.