Ransom of Red Chief

I wrote earlier about how you need to be careful on Spring Break so you don't get kidnapped. They even have road signs to warn you. Apparently, they need some of those signs in Gallatin, Tennessee.

William Ellis (who has an Uncle who uses the name "Fly" and while that's just asking for trouble how cool would it be to have an Uncle Fly?), was kidnapped after armed gunmen broke into his house. Initial ransom demands were $20,000 for William's release.

During 24 hours of negotiations, the ransom demand kept get lowered. "As time passed, it was turning into a frustrated situation and they just beat on me a little bit more, and it got to a point where they was tired of wasting time," Ellis said.

I can only imagine how those phone calls must have gone. "Oh, twenty. Man, that's going to be tough because I don't get paid until next Friday. You keep him for a while more and I'll make a few calls and see what I can do."

"Hey, you're calling again? I thought I was supposed to be calling you. Oh, that's right. I don't have your number. I made some calls but nothing is really happening because a lot of people aren't around at this time of night but I've got a really good NCAA bracket and I'm optimistic. Give me a few hours and I'll call you back. Oh, yeah, that's right. Okay, I'll hear from you then."

"Hey, this isn't happening. I can't find a guy who owes me money. So...um..I guess he's yours. Good luck."

Finally the kidnappers talked to Ellis' sister. She must have the gift of gab because the kidnappers released Ellis after that.

The kidnappers take from this whole caper? Twenty-three dollars stolen when they initially broke into the house.

No word on whether General Motors is hiring the Ellis family to handle their negotiations with the United Auto Workers. Hope they don't need to beat on them a little bit more.