Friday, July 03, 2009

Eternal Flame

Hiya, kids! It's almost July 4th. And as Americans, it's our civic duty to take the day off, eat grilled meat, drink and blow stuff up! Remember, if you skip any of those, the terrorists win.

I will confess to working one summer in a fireworks distribution center. That means I loaded semi's. And got a lot of illegal fireworks when we had stuff left over at the end of the season. Why are all the best fireworks available the very next state over? Lucky stiffs.

But if you're worried about fireworks safety, don't. Because all the fireworks are made in China. And we know what sticklers they are for public safety. So when you read the extremely detailed safety instructions on your illegal fireworks, just follow them carefully.
  • Light fuse
  • Place on ground
  • Get away

That's right. Get away. Nothing can possibly go wrong with that.

But these guys said it best. It's Paul and Storm and it's 4 minutes in. Enjoy!



4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Happy 4th! I wonder how many hillbillies have already blown off their fingers?

foundinidaho said...

I'm sure the hills by your house were lit up with the fires caused by all those fireworks from Wyoming. You think they'd learn.

angie said...

I rewatched one of my favorite Tom and Jerry cartoons of all time--called "Safety Second." For years I would tell people to keep Independence Day "safe and sane" and that's where I got it!

Anonymous said...

When my husband and I returned home after spending the holiday weekend in LA, we saw upon entering the city a big digital sign that read: NO FIREWORKS $1000 FINE. Terrorists 1, Freedom 0. Thankfully, though, Wildfires 0 too.

Happy belated 4th!