An Xmas Poem

From the genius that is Paul Gilmartin comes the following.

You may remember him from Dinner and a Movie. He was the funny one, not the annoying one. Or you may know him from various and sundry appearances on the Bob & Tom Show and their various and sundry CD's.

And while he's legendary here in the Great Grey North for his poem, Tim the Diehard Packer fan, he's also holiday topical.

So enjoy a Christmas Poem by Paul Gilmartin.

Eggnog, tinsel, falling snow,

Buttered rum and mistletoe,

Trimming trees and hanging lights,

The sound of carolers fills the night.

Shopping hours long and hard,

Visa phones and cancels card,

Unpaid bills and mounting debt,

Family gathers, depression sets.

Drinking starts. Harsh words are said,

Dysfunction rears its yuletide head.

Argument turns to shovin',

Drunken brother punches cousin.

Tree tips over popping lights,

Curtains catch, house ignites.

No one hears the reindeer cries,

Wedged in chimney, Santa dies.

Though he kicked,

And did perspire,

His chestnuts roasted,

On an open fire.

Merry Xmas, kids. Hope you're getting to spend it with your famdamily.