So Texas has something called the Big Tex Choice Awards (wow, wonder how long it took them to come up with that name) where they pick the Best Fried Food at the fair. You can read the whole boring story (including quotes from future angioplasty patients) at the Dallas Snooze.
Here's the important part--the entries:
- Fried Banana Split
- Texas Fried Jelly Bellys
- Fire & Ice (a deep fried pineapple ring)
- Fried Chocolate Truffles
- Chocolate-Covered Strawberry Waffle Balls
- Deep Fried S'mores
- Chicken Fried Bacon
- Fernie's All-American Fried Grilled Cheese Sandwich
Mmmm, doesn't that make you want to have a great big deep fried s'more washed down with a warm orange soda with a long, hot walk on some pavement followed by a spin in the Tilt-a-Hurl.
Well I won't keep you in suspense. The winner is......Chicken Fried Bacon! Could anyone ever have doubted the power of bacon. A food so good that (in the words of Jim Gaffigan) you wrap other food in to make it taste better. Like you'd ever have tried a water chestnut without the power of bacon.
Yup, that's the winner over there. Please try not to lick your computer screen. All that drool is bad for the electronics.
But don't worry if you're not into Chicken Fried Bacon. They also have a Corn Dog Eating Contest. No word on whether you're allowed to use your hands or not. And mayonnaise. Entries must be submitted by September 15th. What are you waiting for? Get cracking!
And remember, if you're eating your corn dog erotically, everyone's a winner.
5 comments:
This post makes me want to do 800 situps, it's so calorie-laden!
I like the implication that in order to properly judge the best fried food, one would have to taste all there was to offer. Seems like a pretty easy feat for most Texans.
I admit I love fried pickles, though. They're like crack.
I want to come to Texas and go to the fair. It's not fair I can't go to your fair. Seriously. When I lived in Iowa, I got a week long pass to the state fair. One day for looking at 4H stuff, one day for rides, another day for music, another day just for food and at least one day just for drinking.
I live in Texas and used to go to the fair all the time growing up. The Dallas area schools all have a fair day and the kids get in free. Last year we had fried coke (which I think was actually fried doughnuts with coke poured over it), fried cookie dough, and friend PB & J sandwiches.
Anon, I really, really envy you and your Texas State Fair.
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